LIE DETECTOR-ING MYSELF

Courtesy of Becca. She is so hilarious: y’all need to go follow her immediately. Like, you will thank me, then ignore this blog in favor of her humor.

I, Sarah, am basically following her lead, so here I go!

(Faith: Featuring me and more GIFs than your Christmas GIFts! Actually, no. I hope you had tons of gifts. Even if you don’t celebrate Christmas, gifts are nice. 🙂 )


Sarah 6.0: State your full name, please

Sarah 7.0:  – – – – –     – – – – – – –   – – – –   – – – –   – –  – – – – –  

Sarah 6.0: … Why is it all blacked out?

Sarah 7.0: Because it’s my real name. My full, legal name. All 27 letters.

Sarah 6.0: Why … 27 letters?

Sarah 7.0: I like to blame my Arab parents. We have a thing for long names with lots of a’s.

Sarah 6.0: Then why is your first name blacked out? Surely nothing bad can come out of putting 5 letters on a website. Besides, it’s like written 50 times in this page alone.

Sarah 7.0: That’s that thing… It’s not my real name.

Sarah 6.0:

tumblr_mexnor5gpu1rbe9qf
So you’ve been lying to us the whole time. Wow, SARAH , thanks for the trust.

(F: She’s the opposite of me. Alright, to all Sarah’s peeps: you can now all come over to my sideee… you can have FAITH that I’m a truth-teller. Faithfulness is (literally) my first name. [And actually, my middle name is another adjective. BEAT THAT, WORD NERDS! Uh, I mean, isn’t that kinda cool? If you feel like caring?] Important side note: I’m probably naming my children Joy and possibly Hope. I named my beta fish Happy once… then I found him curled up in the corner of his tank one day. He wasn’t so happy anymore.)

throneoflies_elf

F: Now, here’s a Christmas GIFt. 😉

HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO KNOW IF SHE REALLY LOVED THE BOOKS SHE LIKED? MY 7.0 version is a lie! What if she’s a figment of Faith’s imagination? #blogception (F: Right. Because I talk to myself. IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.)

Sarah 7.0:

125612-well-when-you-put-it-that-way-baic#sorrynotsorry

(Bonus: any one who can guess my real name (it’s an anagram, btw) will not get a prize, but a shout out and an interview with SARAH trails of into maniacal laughter)
Ahem, let us move on.

Sarah 6.0: Why have you been so inactive in the blogosphere as of late?

Sarah 7.0: … But I’ve been active. Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout?

Sarah 6.0: I’m not talking about posting, dummy. (I swear, I get dumber with every reincarnation). I’m asking you why you are so… not verbose. I mean, look at Faith. She comments paragraphs wherever she goes, and manages to spread rainbow vomit and unicorn farts no matter how tired she is. Paul and Yarravy agree with me, right?

Sarah 7.0:

tumblr_lv8d3ljood1qd33mao1_500

I’M SORRY I’M SHY, OKAY? I mean, it’s hard to think up of comments. I mean, do you want to know how Faith and I became friends? DO YOU? (F: It was… terrifying to say the least. Also, on the outside I think we make for a kinda unlikely pair.)

Sarah 6.0: Uh, no. But if you could answer my original question, that would be great.

Sarah 7.0: I WAS SO WEIRD BACK IN YEAR 9 THAT I NUMBERED ALL MY NEW FRIENDS. Wives 1-69. That’s right. WIVES. We still laugh about it now. (F: AHHHH THE BEANS HAVE FINALLY BEEN SPILLED! I actually get nightmares about it now. I think I was around no.18?? #stillscarredtothisday)

Sarah 6.0:… What was the point of that tangent? (F: Wait, what point? There’s many points in a graph for a tangent function… )

tangent-pi

If you are lost looking at the image, don’t worry, I was too. And I still am. I DID SO HORRIBLY ON THESE I’m getting stressed looking at this. Math is not my strong suit. (I was more of an “ace of spades” than an “ace of hearts”. I didn’t heart math. I aimlessly stabbed at it with my rusty metal spade. You can tell that I really aced math.) Pun count: 1348 Way too many puns on puns.

Sarah 7.0: TO SHOW YOU HOW AWKWARD AND SOCIALLY INEPT AND COMPLETELY UN-VERBOSE I  AM. MOVING ON.

Sarah 6.0: …What are your pet peeves? The tl:dr version please. (F: THE IRONY. I had to Google what tldr was… no comment. ACTUALLY here’s my comment: EVERYTHING I SAY is probably marked tldr by someone out there. 😄 )

Sarah 7.0: Well. I hate Mexicans, burritos, tacos, books, Faith

Sarah 6.0: –

tumblr_nsb3kntct71re3x32o1_500

WAIT WHAT?!?

Sarah 7.0: Hm? Was it something I said?

Sarah 6.0: Wha- How- Why- HOW DO YOU HATE BURRITOS? And what did them Mexicans do to you? Sarah, I swear, if you have been reincarnated as some racist Donald Trump supporter, I will end my life (and yours) with my BARE HANDS! I mean, you can’t just go and say that on a blog? What would your mother think? Honestly, I’m so disa-

Sarah 7.0: I WAS JOKING! (F: Dude. Girl. Sarah. Whatever your name even is. You don’t joke about that stuff. YOU DON’T JOKE ABOUT HATING BOOKS. Off limitos. Oh yeah, and there’s me. Don’t hate me.)

Sarah 6.0:

tumblr_mdlzwydyot1qkhd9i

Sarah 7.0: Jeez, I was just trying to keep you guys on your toes…

Sarah 6.0: -_- *sighs* Just answer the question already.

Sarah 7.0: I hate bent book covers, winter coats, weather above 25 degrees (CELSIUS 😄 ), School, and Faith. I wasn’t joking about that 😉 aaaaaaaaaand racial profiling.

Sarah 6.0: Wait, why do you hate racial profiling? (F: Buuuuuuuut you don’t mention why you hate Faith. Right. Or left because I’m left handed. Just curious, who’s left handed out there?? * raises left hand *)

Sarah 7.0: Before I wore my head scarf, people would take turns guessing where I’m from. Like I’d get every country on that map (oddly enough, except where I’m actually from). UK, Australia, Russia, Brazil, South Africa, Chile, Morocco, Spain, India… you name it, somebodies guessed it (excluding Japan, and China – I have been asked if I’m half Korean). People would look at my hair and ask me if I was half- insert ethnicity here. It was pretty annoying after the first time. Though, now I only deal with TSA/Airport security checks every single time I fly internationally. #arabgirlproblems

Sarah 6.0:.. So where are you from?

Sarah 7.0: Egypt. You know, just in case I haven’t mentioned it a billion times already.

Sarah 6.0: Ohhhh, so can you speak Egyptian? (F: HAH. I can. Pyramids, sphinxes, desert, murderous heat – am I an honorary Egyptian yet???)

Sarah 7.0:

12wpelekteojuy

This is for you, Faith. Though yes, I now deem you an honorary Egyptian. 😀

Do you mean Arabic?

Sarah 6.0: Wait, so Egyptian isn’t a thing?

Sarah 7.0: No, and no one but Egyptologists can read ancient hieroglyphs. I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed. I can, however, read to you in a nice french accent and talk to you in Egyptian slang…

Sarah 6.0: Hold your shade, girl… no one sasses me.

Sarah 7.0:

giphy3

Sarah 7.0 locking Sarah 6.0 out.

Sarah 6.0:

tumblr_inline_mzo181ro3h1re3w10

Breaking back in.

Sarah 7.0: Can we just continue with the questions before this post deteriorates even more? (F: Too late.)

Sarah 6.0: What are your favourite things?

Sarah 7.0: … Can you be more specific? Favourite books? Movies? Shows? Colours? Foods? Murder Methods? (F: Short and easy answer to regain our friendship = Faith)

Sarah 6.0: … Do you have any siblings?

Sarah 7.0: Yes. Them-Three-Who-Shalt-Not-Be-Named. (F: Name suggestions for hidden identities: Thing 1, 2, and 3? Is that mean? It’s definitely not median or mode, though. I think it’s kinda cute and hilarious. DR. SEUSS YA KNOW??)

Sarah 6.0: Why must they not be named?

Sarah 7.0: Do you want to read lines of blacked out names? Cuz we all got five names. And they already stalk the blog enough as it is. I don’t need to give them more fodder. (F: Huh, they read our blog? Shoot. WHY?! They’re going to be reading some misconceived ideas about me… I’M NOT ABSOLUTELY CRAZY AND I DON’T SHOUT ALL THE TIME! Though I just did.)

Sarah 6.0: I see you have a … very loving relationship.

Sarah 7.0:

large

We are.

Savages. We are so cruel to each other it’s actually pretty funny.

Sarah 6.0: bb9e877c1dca4fcb5d74bf437a178fb5-279x240x6

Sarah 7.0: Do you want to hear about the time we wrecked-

Sarah 6.0: – OKAY. It’s Sarah’s bed time, so GOOD DAY AND NIGHT FOLKS! We sure hoped you enjoyed this utterly random post: be sure to check out Becca’s original post.

Sarah 7.0: MMMH HMM MHMM HHMH MMMMM

Sarah 6.0:

shut-your-mouth-gif

Sarah 6.0: We’d like to nominate you, dear reader, to interrogate yourself and enjoy the madness!

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25 thoughts on “LIE DETECTOR-ING MYSELF

  1. Alex says:

    So you’re Arab? (You’re not kidding, right? RIGHT?) shakes your shoulders virtually
    Thank you so much for brightening up my ridiculously dull day (who am I kidding? Everyday is dull) and I understand if you don’t comment a lot because even I’m like that too! I just get tongue-tied and I go like, whaaaat should I reply to this? #bloggerproblems
    Also, Sherlock gifs which I LOVEEEEEEEEE 😆

    Liked by 1 person

  2. hiraethforthepages says:

    WAIT WAIT WAIT. Let’s back this up a little. YOUR NAME IS NOT SARAH? WOW that was a very unexpected. HMMM, anagram? Are you a Hannah? That’s really the only name I know that is one. DO I NOT GET A PRIZE.

    AHAHAAHA YESS, Faith spreads her wonderful wonderful rainbow vomits and unicorn farts everywhereeee 🙂 But I mean OF COURSE, we are trying to break the WordPress comment limit and everything so the paragraphs are a necessary thing 😉 I guess I must apologise unverbose Sarah for creating comments that are (mostly) long and (sometimes) annoying I AM BRINGING OUT YOUR INNER COMMENT DEMON. But never fear, feel free to ignore me I GET IT sometimes I can’t stop talking so really its COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE (even if I cry).

    I was terrified, by the way, about the whole pet peeves thing (I also had to search tl:dr, WHY IS INTERNET SPEAK SO DIFFICULT) I MEAN REALLY, I thought Donald Trump possessed you and we lost our Sarah BUT THEN YOU SAID JUST JOKING AND I FAINTED WITH RELIEF. SARAH IS HERE.

    Liked by 1 person

    • sublimereads says:

      IT ISN’T! The funny thing is, that I asked my mom a while back, what she thought of naming me… AND SARAH WAS ON THAT LIST! So really, I wasn’t far off 😛
      Well, Hannah isn’t 5 letters, and does not contain an r or s, sooooo no 😄
      But you do get a prize for guessing ❤

      She does, doesn’t she? I swear, most days, all the WordPress notifications are for her conversations on other blogs 😄 That being said, I do love talking with Wife #57 (AKA YOU), so I will join your attempts at breaking the WP comment limit, so that I can bring out my inner comment demon. Question: are the demons like Pokemon (I SUMMON YOU, MUD-KIP) or is it more like possession? Asking for a worried trainee 😛

      Wow I’m sorta regretting putting it in now, because so many of you lovely peeps were worried that I actually went crazy 😀 BUT ITS OK, I WILL SAY NO TO POSSESSION BY ANYTHING OTHER THAN A COMMENT DEMON

      Liked by 1 person

      • hiraethforthepages says:

        OMG ITS BEEN TWO DAYS. IVE BEEN REPLYING TO COMMENTS AND I LEFT THIS LOVELY BABY ALONE.
        BUT WAIT JUST A SECOND. Did you choose a random name and just have it be YOUR OWN POSSIBLE NAME. I NOW HAVE FAITH IN FATE (aha see what I did there 😉 ) Damn, I was completely off wasn’t I? 😄
        AHA, shucks that’s adorable 🙂 DAMN WIFE #57? I FEEL SO HONOURED fans myself and faints Yes, AHA, we will do this! DUN NANA DUN. Wow, I never wondered what the demons are like and damn you got me thinking. Is it an adorable little Pokemon OR A RAGING MONSTER READY TO EAT SOME BLOODY SOULS?
        Aha, YEA I THOUGHT YOU WENT CRAZY but now, YAS I KNOW YOU ARE CRAZY (in a very good, non-Trump, awesome way) LET OUR COMMENT DEMONS CONSUME US BADUM DUMBA DUM DUMMMM.

        Liked by 1 person

        • sublimereads says:

          TRUUUUUEEEEEEEE I FEEL YOU
          It’s like you leave for an hour, and everybody and their cousin decides to comment/comment back. @.@
          Well, it was like a random anagram, and a lot of people mix my name up, so I just decided to roll with it 😛 Yes, we are all fated to make the feted Faith puns 😄
          Awwwwww yay you are so happy :3 You know what Faith said the other day? That she was gonna start her revenge plan for the wifey thing… SAVE ME! HIDE ME! ANYWHERE ELSE O.O
          I know! I was like, are we gonna fo for that misunderstood angle, or are we gonna straight out channel Satan? Choices, choices >:)

          For this adorable comment, you move to wife #34 😄

          Liked by 1 person

          • hiraethforthepages says:

            Right?! Aha, this happens every time I go to sleep 😄 #australiantimezoneproblems (because that is a very real thing). Gosh, this is so cool 😛 Every single time I hear myself going: I have Faith in you, I hack up into giggles because I know it’s oversaid BUT ITS STILL FUNNY (I, as you might be able to tell, will laugh at anything).
            SO HAPPY I’M TELLING YOU. Aha, I wish you luck. Nobody wants to be at the end of that creative, horrifying end of Faith’s wrath. This may be the last time I see you with sanity (or maybe I’m already too late).
            YES I MOVED UP! From 57 to 34? GET OUT OF THE WAY LADIES, SARAH IS MINE 🙂 laughs maniacally into insanity

            Like

  3. tattooedpages says:

    HAHAHA! fun post! I thougt I read wrong when I saw the pet peeves thing (Psst, I’m Mexican) then saw it was a joke. Lol! Girl, you is funny. So your name is an anagram of Sarah? and you’re Arab? cracks nuckles Challenge accepted. So an anagram means a rearrangement of letters to create another word. Hmm, is it Rasha? I’m pretty sure it’s Rasha 🙂 Let me know if I’m right!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Paul @ The Galaxial Word says:

    YAYY SARAH IS BACK (and it’s true, Faith went rampant with her rainbow vomit and page long comments while you were away!! SAVE US!! ༼ つ ಥ_ಥ ༽つ XD. Jk)

    THIS WAS A RANDOM POST BUT I LOVED IT and it was so strange reading about a conversation between “three” people but SO entertaining 😄

    Liked by 2 people

    • sublimereads says:

      YAY SOMEONE CARES 😀
      Don’t lie Paul, we all know that you like vomiting rainbows too 😛
      I know! Honestly, I know that I mentioned that I could be a figment of her imaginations, but in reality, she could probably be a figment of mine. Although, you can’t beat the full on Faith experience 😀
      CAN YOU BELIEVE TODAY SHE DIDN’T GIVE ME SOBA NOODLES?
      I was so hurt!
      Ok, I’ll cut off here before you end up learning things you didn’t want to know 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      • Paul @ The Galaxial Word says:

        FOUR DAYS LATER! * sob * I DON’T VOMIT RAINBOWS. I post extremely intellectual and philosophical comments that will completely change your life. I also use very long words to make my comments seem more pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis. So yeah. No rainbows here. Only pure intellect and smartiness.

        AND NOOOOOOOO. FAITH. SHARE YOUR SOBA NOODLES OTHERWISE I WILL HAUL YOUR ASS OVER TO AUSTRALIA AND FEED YOU VEGEMITE AND LAMINGTONS.

        YOU THERE (○`д´)ノシ YES YOU FAITH. STOP RIGHT THERE Σ(っ゚Д゚)っ Eeeek!

        Liked by 1 person

        • sublimereads says:

          I swore I responded to you, but here is me SIX DAYS LATER! HA! I beat you cries

          Sees long word and eyes start twitching LOL I GOOGLED IT I GET IT
          It’s uncountable face palms Where did you even find this word? Did you eat a dictionary when you were younger? Rainbows can be intellectual, ya know. How else would the leprechauns make gold off of it? Braaaaaaains is the answer 😛

          IKRRRRRRRRRR
          What is this vegemite you speak of? Is it… dangerous? Lamingtons? TEACH ME YOUR AUSTRALIAN WAYS!

          Yes, scold her smug 😄

          Liked by 1 person

  5. Word Wonders says:

    I swear I never laughed this much at a post in my life , tears are literally pouring out of my eyes hahahahhaa!
    So :
    1- I think I guessed your name evil laugh not all 27 letters, just the 5 haha.
    2- I get the ethnicity thing a lot. But what is weird is that I live in Morocco so it is not hard to guess, but people have come up asking if I’m REALLY moroccan, ones I got: Indian, Brazilian, Mexican (Latina mostly)
    3- I totally get the long name thing ahahaha. Mine is fairly short but I KNOW.

    Liked by 1 person

    • sublimereads says:

      I’m glad you enjoyed reading this!
      1&2 – You probably had the advantage of being arab! (on that note: YAY A FELLOW ARAB WHAT UP SISTERRRRRR). Now I want to know, so if you want a completely crazy interview with me, then email it to (sublimereads@gmail.com) 😀
      NOW I REALLY WANNA KNOW IF YOU KNOW 😛
      Yup, I think it’s the curse of the arab girl. OH WOW I WOULD BE SO OFFENDED! Like, guys, I LIVE HERE! Haha, I know a lot of friends that get mistaken for Latinas. One even had boys try to chat her up in Spanish… only to realize she had no idea what they were saying 😄
      3- Ah, you are one of the lucky ones then! Thank your parents 😉

      Like

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